Aunty Esha: My guy friend says he wants to be more than just friends
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Friends with benefits

Question: Recently one of my close guy friends of five years expressed that he wanted us to become more than just friends. This has put me in a very awkward position, as I only like him as a friend. When I was honest with him about this, he was upset and now things between us have changed. I feel really bad and would still like for us to remain friends but he can’t see me in the same way anymore. Have I lost a good friend, if so how do I make it right? – Alex, 19 from Birmingham

Dear Alex,

Sorry to hear about your predicament, but unfortunately with close male and female friendships this sometimes happens; one friend becomes emotionally attached to the other and feels rejected when the feelings are not reciprocated.

However, I would suggest that you maintain your stance and not become involved in a relationship based on guilt. Please don’t beat yourself up. He may be feeling hurt, but you are not responsible for his decision not to maintain the friendship; I am afraid it is a choice that he has made. Hopefully he will recover.

You may have to accept the fact that the relationship has now altered and if your friend cannot accept your decision that you only want to be friends, then you may have be prepared to let go and move on.

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