Once upon a time in the land of a girl world, there was an unwritten friendship code of things that determine our sense of loyalty as true friends as well as those things we should NEVER even consider…You know like going out with your best friends ex-boyfriend…

 

1.If you’re in this it’s ride or die fool! True friendship is more than just you being available on the weekends for a shopping spree or a trip to the cinemas on Orange Wednesday. If it’s 2:00am, I’m stranded and have no money to get home, what are you going to do? You are going to pick up my call first time and say I will be there in 10 minutes.

2. You must be out of your of your mind if you think I’m going to sit here and let you talk trash about my best friend! True friends never allow others to publicly tarnish your character without defending you in you’re absence or at least giving the vicious ‘say one more thing if you’re bad’ side eye.

3. In the infamous words of Gretchen Wieners ‘ Ex-boyfriends are just off limits to friends. I mean that’s just like the rules of feminism.’< – #Amen2Dat I don’t care how secretly good looking you think he is, the answer is no! In fact, this shouldn’t even cross your mind, and if it does please revaluate your sense of loyalty…shame on you!

4. While we’re on the subject of ex’s, we know it was painful for you to pretend to like your best friends boyfriend after watching him practically rip her heart into shreds! But unfortunately,  her insanity to give him five more chances than he deserved, meant that you were subjected to being the third wing of a dead end relationship (charming!). However the moment they break up, it’s now your job to rush over to her house with plenty of sweets, a box of brownies, can of cream, oh and your favourite Spotify playlist while you stuff yourselves silly and trash any memories of him once and for all!

5. When your friend gets wonderful news – a once in a lifetime job opportunity, exciting internship or an unexpected exceptional exam result, you had better act like you’ve just won the lottery from Oprah herself. Their joy is your joy, you should never feel annoyed at your friend’s successes, and if you are, I think you to have several seats; a footstall and an armrest…then do us all a favour and revaluate yourself (again!)

6. When they have blatantly ignored your good and wholesome advice on a matter and end up making an utter fool of themselves, no matter how satisfying it seems, you will ignore the temptation to say, “I told you so!”.  Hey, you’re just glad that in the end they realised you were right all along (even if they had to find out the hard way.)

7. You never need to say it’s my turn to choose what film we watch. Petty arguments are long-winded and unnecessary and by now you’ve worked out that by being fair to one another means less drama for all!

8. Forget the I.O.U’s, what’s yours is mine, like that DVD, favourite top, Betty Boop pen and various other things you’ve both “temporarily” borrowed from each other’s houses and have still failed to return after 10 years of friendship. Real friends never get hooked up over money, inanimate objects or materialism. You’ve both worked out by now that if you kept a tab on how much money you really owed one another throughout the duration of your relationship, it would take an additional lifetime (plus a miracle) to pay it back. It’s like this, if you end up paying for this week’s cinema trip, you know they’ve got dibs on popcorn.

9. Friends tick each other off all the time, but you are only ever allowed to stay mad for three days…unless you have already told them why. After the three-day period, get over it! It’s far too much energy to hold a grudge, besides it’s your best friend and by now you and I both know that you must have important things to tell them.

10. Once you have forgiven your friend for messing up (as they’re prone to do on many more occasions throughout your friendship), forgive them properly, as in let it go and don’t bring it up again unless you’re both sitting on a park bench with a cone of ice-cream and laughing with tears of joy on all the crazy memories you have shared together.